how about seconds

i found this interesting. it is economics but amusing if you are thinking of adopting again.

January 19, 2005
The Selfish Reason to Have More Kids
Bryan Caplan

Steve Landsburg has some powerful moral arguments for having another kid. (See the chapter "People Wanted" in Fair Play). Contrary to organizations like Zero Population Growth, the externalities of another productive human being are positive, not negative.

But like most economists, I don't think that the typical person's willingness to pay to do the right thing is very high. What fraction of your income are you giving to tsunami victims?

There is however a purely selfish argument for making another baby that most people overlook. I know a lot of parents who pull out their hair on a daily basis who are sure to disagree. But they are guilty of a grave error: Focusing exclusively on the present. When your offspring are ages 4 and 2, adding a newborn seems like a tough burden. And it is.

But think ahead to your golden years. How many kids do you need to get as many visits, phone calls, and grandkids as you would like? 5? 10? An old saying tells us that "One parent can care for five children, but five children cannot care for one parent." It could happen to you.

Basic microeconomics recommends a simple strategy. Have the number of children that maximizes average utility over your whole lifespan. When you are 30, you might feel like two children is plenty. But once you are 60, you are more likely to prefer ten sons and daughters to keep you company and keep the grandkids coming. A perfectly selfish and perfectly foresighted economic agent would strike a balance between these two states. For example, he might have four kids total - two too many at 30, six too few at 60.

Trust me - you'll thank me later. Your third child ought to thank me too, but we all know better than to expect gratitude from the young. Now all you have to do is convince your spouse!

Gorging on Ethiopian Food

No adoption news to post so I'll just write a little something about pigging out on Ethiopian food the past week or so. We only have one Ethiopian restaurant in town. It's really good, and the day that they're closed (Mondays) they actually ship food over to one of our natural-foods stores to serve on the hot bar. So, last Monday we got dinner from the hot bar. On Saturday, Tim's parents took us to the restaurant for dinner (thanks again guys). And yesterday a coworker and I hit up the hot bar during lunch. It's OK, you can oink at me. I don't care. I'm addicted to the food. I just wish I could get an Ethiopian cooking lesson so we don't have to eat it out all the time. Any suggestions? - Sarah

Shot update

So my shots on Friday weren't all that painful. The woman at the travel clinic who gave them to me was amazing, and the doc spent close to an hour explaining the shots and the dos and don'ts of travel. I'd already had Hep. B shots as a kid so I got round 1 of Hep. A, Yellow Fever and Meningitis. I got prescriptions for two other things and I have a refrigerated dosage of Typhoid in the fridge now (it's so weird to open the fridge to get some milk and see the words TYPHOID staring back at you!). I chose the oral typhoid b/c it last five years vs the two or three with the shot.

My left arm's really sore (golf ball-sized lump and all) and yesterday I felt quite flu-like, but I think I'm going to be OK. Maybe I'm not as big of a baby as I thought I was. : )

In keeping with our goal of buying one baby item a week, Tim and I bought a changing pad, covers and sheets at Target yesterday. We also got some adorable shoes with elephants on the top. When we finally break down and get a digital camera I'll upload and image. They're so cute. Have a great Sunday! - Sarah

Shots for Sarah

A few months ago Tim had his first round of immunizations, and tomorrow's my turn. I can be kind of a baby when it comes to those things, so I'm hoping it all turns out well. Tim was sore after his but didn't get sick... hopefully I won't either. On the other hand, if I'm sore I won't have to help rake leaves this weekend. Haha.

This weekend we're also getting physicals for our homestudy renewal. Tim got his fingerprints today so we can send those off tomorrow. We have another visit with our homestudy agency in two weeks. It's an in-home visit, which kinda surprised me, but no biggie. Anyone else going through the renewal process now while they wait for a referral? - Sarah

One (Attempted) Step Forward, One Step Back

Today the cable guy came to install an Internet connection in the soon-to-be-office. BUT, since that part of the house is an addition, he'd have to do some pretty weird stuff that involved cutting into the brick. So, we now have to call someone else who can go through the wall. OR, we'll have to set up the wireless router in the baby's room and get a wireless card the the PC (we already have the router for my laptop). So that was our attempt at a step forward in the nursery process.

Our step back also involves the house. It seems like this time of year we usually have a little extra money, but that's always when the house goes to pot. We live in a 1940s house, which we recently discovered has galvanized pipes. This kind of pipe is no longer used since it allows mineral deposits to build up. We experienced this with our bathtub and toilet less than a year ago, but instead of getting all the pipes replaced at once, for some reason we held off. Now we have no choice but to replace the others since a pipe in our sink dissolved. Our fab plumber (seriously, the guy's awesome) is out of town, but hopefully he can come Tuesday. Good thing we added a half bath when we did our remodel last year. -Sarah

I'm Getting Excited Now

Throughout this process - waiting, paperwork, etc. - I've remained pretty emotionally numb. It's been the only way to get me through. People frequently ask me how I'm able to cope so well. To be honest, sometimes I just let myself forget we're even adopting. It's what works; don't knock it.

Anyway, ever since we finally told our agency that we really want to be matched specifically with a boy something's changed. I'm not panicked or anxious, I'm just excited. I feel it brewing. It was like all the sudden it finally hit me: It may not be tomorrow or in four months (oh, we're 10 months in now, by the way), but this is really happening... Tim and I are going to be parents!

So, whereas before I wouldn't even think about painting the nursery or looking at baby furniture, now the wheels are in motion. Monday night Tim and I started to fill out Our Chosen Child, which is kinda like a baby book/pregnancy journal for adoptive parents. A dear pal gave it to me and I highly recommend it. I put some super cute kids books about uncles (I have two awesome brothers who are going to be kick ass uncles) and grandparents into my Amazon cart. Sunday the cable guy's coming to install the Internet hookup in what will be the new office, making way for the nursery in the current office. And next Saturday Tim and I've got a date to look at baby items in an actual store. Oh, and I broke out the Consumer Reports issues that I've been hoarding and am making a spreadsheet of the best car seats (if you didn't know by now I'm TypeA x 20!). I'm not to the point where I'm ready to paint the nursery, but I'm at least thinking about colors.

Thanks for all of your support. - Sarah

Mommy Track?

Two posts in one day - must be a rainy Sunday!

I found this essay today on Babble about stay-at-home moms. This is certainly a topic Tim and I face at the moment. I don't think I've ever really seen myself as a stay-at-home mom - we've both worked really hard to get to where we are with our careers. But on the other hand, why go through all of this stuff to become a parent if you're just going to stick them in daycare for 8 hours a day? Plus, daycare freaks me out!!! It seems like every time you turn on the news you hear another horror story.

How have you dealt with this? - Sarah